I guess I'm supposed to have some sort of evocative and crystal-clear memory of Pudge that I can weave into narrative form, but that isn't really the case, and I'd prefer not to try and force something that isn't there. I knew at the time -- and certainly know now -- that I was witnessing something special every time he stepped onto a baseball field, and I know that he should be a lock to go into the Hall of Fame as a Texas Ranger and a first-ballot entrant, but I'll leave the reminiscing over specific highlights to those with better stories to tell.
Here, incidentally, is the Pudge retirement press conference in full for those who couldn't break away during the middle of the workday to punch up FSNSW -- who inexplicably cut away during the middle of Pudge's speech for a minute's worth of commercials, though the network did apologize for its mistake later -- or MLB Network:
We can do the Hall of Fame/PEDs argument some other time, but I do want to get this off my chest -- the BBWAA won't be hurting Pudge if it decides to use its suspicions as a reason to not elect him in his first year of eligibility. It will only be hurting itself.