What is your opinion of the A.J. Pierzynski signing?
MJH on accountability
Baseball is fun, but baseball while drunk is surreal. It should be noted that this game is not backed by Joey or any of the rest of the writers at BBTiA even though I'm pretty sure Parks would have been behind it.
Pregame:-Take one drink for every undone button on Mike Napoli's jersey. -Chug for the entirety of Nadel's uniform descriptions.-Take one drink for every Eric Karros hair out of place (look carefully).-Take a drink every time AJ Pierzynski says "bro" or "dude"
During the Game Take One Drink If:- Announcers make reference to Michael Young's leadership.- Refer to Michael Young as clutch.- Refer to Michael Young as a "professional hitter"- PADMY (only in games where MY fields, maybe)- Ian Kinsler pops out- Cliff Lee is mentioned- CJ Wilson's twitter is mentioned- The announcers make a quip about Nolan Ryan "wanting to be out there" or "still being able to get hitters out"- Scenic shots of Dallas or Fort Worth are shown for a game in Arlington- Mike Napoli hits a homerun (optional: we don't want people to get alcohol poisoning)- Adrian Beltre taps his feet after an inside pitch- The announcers refer to a decent/ok player as necessary. Example: "Every championship team needs a player like David Murphy"- Every time Terry Francona makes reference to the fact that he's announcing now. Examples: "This isn't so hard", "Well I'm new to this, but", "Well it appears to me that Derek Holl... WHY OH GOD WHY HOW COULD WE NOT BEAT THE GODDAMN ORIOLES" - Joe Buck sounds like he wishes he was somewhere else- Ken Rosenthal looks really, really short- The umpire make a call differently from the pitch tracker- The "Sitting Duck" is flashed
Ian Kinsler Body Language Chart:-Slumped shoulders- -1 drink-Bat slam --------------3 drinks-Glove pund-----------2 drinks-Dogs it up the line---2 drinks-Argument with ump- Chug until finished arguing
Finish your drink if:-Ron Washington's gut is referenced-Hamilton slides head first into all 4 bases-Julio Borbon is referenced-Adrian Beltre's head gets touched-Any "Oh shit's" or "F*ck yes" caught coming from the Rangers dugout-Joe Buck says the word "Dutchstache"-Scott Feldman comes into the game (you will probably already be drinking anything you can touch)
Finally:-When the trade deadline/offseason acquisitions are brought up finish your drink, break the bottle over your head and Kinsler skip around the room.
Feel free to add more in the comments.
I usually drink any time Tag says "cookie lady" and that usually works out pretty well during the regular season.
My impression of Nadel's Uniform description:
The Rangers Are wearing their Royal Blues today with "Texas" across the chest, complimented by white pants with a matching pinstripe down the side. CJ Wilson swipes the dirt off of the rubber with his blue glove as the wind blows the pants softly across his butt cheek like the wind over a prairie plain."
When playing this game, what inning is the over/under for alcohol poisoning?
All funny stuff! And as to Guy's question: Kinsler's pop-up outs will put you past the thresh-hold by the 4th.
I am drunk just from reading. Nice Job FT
Every time Beltre's 3 hr is mentioned, drinkEvery time Deep in the heart of Texas is played double drink\Every time they show nolan in the stands drinkk (careful you might be out by the third inning)Every time Hambone's past is mention drink
pretty spot on, but its always good to find ways to get dudes tanked:
Any time Matty Ice forces a GDP drink 2Any time Elvis double clutches a ball and still throws the runner out drink 2During in game commentary anytime you catch your self missing Lewin drink 1Any time you catch yourself missing Rhads kill your beer (Francona's that bad you'll be knocking em back)
Dare I say it...... Any time Shannon Stone or that incident is brought up pour some out. Then take a shot cuz its gotten old; and he's gonna have a golden statue before Dirk does in front of the AAC.
Any time Joe Buck accidentallly calls someone Troy take a shotAny time Colby Lewis and Japan are brought up take a shot of sakeAny time the Yankees are mentioned (even though theyre no longer in the playoffs) grab a gun and shoot yourself in the head
Any time Josh Hits a Grand Slam and you think of the CC carpet girl (jail bait) finish your beerAny time TerraNova is brought up drink one for James Cameron's pocketbook takin a hitWhen it goes to Detroit theres only one to add, any time they play the 8 mile theme lock your wife/gf/so in a room a set the house of fire.
thats all i got!
I don't think I have enough alcohol, or the tolerance, to play this game for the whole game.
I'll spot you, bro. But who's driving?
one more,Legend modeEvery time Joe Buck cleverly adds a sponsor name to a stat frame take a shot. An example would be:"Chase Sapphire Player to watch"Cautions, you could have liver breakdown before the 7th inning stretch.
Far too many rules for a drinking game. Lots of good stuff, just need to pare down the list a bit.
Every time Ron Washington struggles to get a sunflower seed out of his mouth, drink!
Every time an opposing player makes an error take a shot and anytime a ranger player makes an error chug your beer!
everytime the camera zooms in on a pretty girl in the stands ...drink!
Any time you feel like throwing up from drinking too much during the game, drink some more.
Alcoholic/average Texan version- every hit take a drink, and every run take a shot.
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